No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Randomize
