i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize