I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I wish i was in the wii world.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
