Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
