I'm lost and stupid without you.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
