i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
