I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
