No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Pooping to opera.
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