one might say we're banned from that church
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
