wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
what is it with giant penises always finding me
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
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