you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
