I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
