remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
A+ Viking dick
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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