what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
