so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
he had hair everywhere except his balls
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Randomize
