How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
