I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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