We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize
