I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Houston, we have a squirter
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
