do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Randomize