Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I just found puke in my bra..
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
