THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
and she was petting her beer can
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Randomize
