did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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