I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize
