There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
