if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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