I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
