Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
They left me at home... I'm a liability
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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