You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
