just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
