I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
How does one acquire holy water?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
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