Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
did you just send me my own nude
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
