Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
