he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize