grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Randomize
