the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
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