it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
