Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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