im about as happy as oj after his trial
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
