I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
