Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
