this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
