yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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