We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
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