is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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