you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
