is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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