Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
