Don't make out with my wife yet
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i wish my penis had a tongue
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
