Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
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