Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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